As you know, forgiveness has been on my mind a lot lately. I’m still taking the forgiveness process one day at a time because part of me wants to hold onto resentment and hurt from past situations with friends, coworkers, bosses, boyfriends, and relatives. And honestly, part of me wants to hang onto that resentment and hurt because I don’t want to let those people off the hook for what they did or said to me. Can you relate to that feeling?
But here’s the thing. Forgiveness isn’t about the people who we may feel wronged or hurt by. Forgiveness is for us. As Deepak Chopra says, “Forgiveness is a gift we give to ourselves.” We don’t forgive because we condone someone else’s behavior or words. We don’t forgive because we want to remove responsibility from that person and make them feel better.
We forgive because we want to feel better. We forgive because we want our lives to be happier and more peaceful.
We don’t have to worry about that other person at all. All that forgiveness asks of us is to let go of our anger, resentment, and hurt…because it drains our energy, makes it harder for us to be vulnerable and authentic with others, and doesn’t change what happened anyway.
Forgiveness offers us a beautiful opportunity to clear out that stale resentment, anger, and hurt, and welcome happiness, peace, and ease. And when we’re in that happy, peaceful place, we attract more good things into our lives. We can let those people we’re resenting be on their own path; we don’t have to worry about how they feel or what they’re doing. We can relax and just worry about creating a peaceful, happy life for ourselves.
I think if we view forgiveness as a gift we give to ourselves, as something that will make our own lives better, then we’ll be motivated to forgive, and then experience all of the amazing things forgiveness has to offer us!
Forgiveness is tricky, and I’m still figuring it out a day at a time. If you’re in the same boat, hopefully this post helps you out!